Farewell Jan, My Wife, My Lover, My Friend, My Soulmate............

This will be the last posting to Jan's Blog. After a serious illness, sadly Jan passed away on 7 February 2013 in the Cairns Base Hospital. She was at peace and in no pain.

She was a sincere, kind, gentle and beautiful lady.  I loved her so much and miss her terribly.  She will forever be in my heart.  We were devoted to each other - "two peas in a pod" it was said.

Her devoted and loving husband.

Chris

Ponderings...

I have been fairly ill this past month..so haven't written much- but as I believe I am turning the corner in my newest challenge race, it has made me reflective....

Christmas is almost here, which just happens to be my most favourite holiday, and not feeling well enough to conquer the shopping festivities, I must admit that Chris has done a remarkable job of buying the needed presents for others.

We love buying and giving gifts to others--it probably is to us what this holiday is all about--appreciating our family and friends.  We love giving--I currently give to various charities, and when we moved and just gave so many of our belongings away, the look on the faces of the recipients was priceless.  The act of giving makes us feel happy and more so because in a lot of cases the recipients couldn't believe their luck in what we gave them - from furniture to surfboards to wooden children's play sets--it is the smiles that make us so happy.

So in this spirit I ventured out recently and found some good presents for family, and met many Christmas elves along the way--when one is happy in life it is amazing how others react--I love the smiles and well wishes and the joy that surrounds us when we shop.

Do this one little trick for me--when you are shopping this year, as it is always hectic, remember to smile at strangers, and always have a kind comment for shop-keepers.  It is amazing what a smile does.  I taught this to my youngest daughter, and she also admits that she is so surprised at the reactions she gets!  Sometimes the smile leads to a conversation, or a helpful tip on where to find a difficult gift--you would be amazed.  I try to do this now, year round.  Just try it--you will feel so good for doing so.

Well, we still have a bit more shopping to do, but I am sure that this will be a great Christmas for us all - enjoy your lead up to Christmas--I sure do intend to!

KFC

I have no idea what possessed us--but this cute little chicken popped her head up one day, while we were in the pet store looking -- really for nothing.. We had no intention of buying a pet, but thought it would be fun to go in and have a look!  Before we knew it...we were the proud family owners of a little yellow chicken...so small, so defenseless, and so able to wrap its little
baby chick claws around our hearts!

We took her home and bedded her down in a cardboard box in our large central hallway.  We put in some shredded paper for her to try to make into a bed, and a small container of water.  The pet shop people had advised us on what to feed her, by memory I think it was special pellets.  Then we just sat there on the floor admiring her, and trying to decide what to call her.  At last it hit us!  KFC!  A perfect name for a perfect little chick.

At the time we were taking weekend trips down to our beachhouse, so it was only natural that we would take KFC with us!  She was just a baby and needed our attention.  KFC would sit in her box on the backseat with Maddie, and all 4 of us would head off.  Night-time on a Saturday night there, usually meant that after dinner we would head downstairs to watch a video we had hired. So settling ourselves on the couch, there would be me, Maddie squeezed in next to me, so that she could hold and rub my hair--her sleepy thing, and Chris, with KFC on his shoulder.  She would snuggle into Chris' neck and doze, sometimes having little accidents on his shirt, but we just cleaned him off.  She was KFC and our baby!

This went on for a few weeks, and then KFC started to 'chicken-fy'--she grew longer legs, and her lovely yellow fuzz was turning into a rich brownish coating of feathers.   Our girl was beginning to grow up!  She graduated from her box to a largish wire cage which I had used at one stage for a pet cockatoo.  She still lived in our hallway, but as she was getting older she wasn't quite so convenient for travelling. While we still loved holding her and cuddling her, it was a new stage of development for her and us!  As time passed she graduated to living outside in a bird aviary that we had.  After we decided that we liked the idea of having more chickens, Chris built a chicken yard, and KFC's aviary became a refuge from the weather for the newly arrived chickens if they ever needed it...it was in there that they laid their eggs.

KFC, being the first chicken, obviously was boss, and she taught the other fledglings how this world worked--of course she was very partial to us--she was our first born chick!  At the time Jock was our only Border Collie, and he and KFC were fairly good friends.  Each morning as either Maddie or Chris emptied the 'chook' dish into the chook house, (a combination of vegetable scrapings and scraps from the meal on the previous night), Jock would stand guard as the eggs were gathered, and then nodding to KFC, he would leave the pen with his majestic tail in the air.  What attitude!

Life continued this way for a while, until it was discovered that I needed surgery for a fairly serious condition, followed by a long recovery at home.

During the recovery period, I would often walk outside in the back garden to get some sun, and to talk to the 'girls'.  It was at this point that I noticed that KFC wasn't her usual self.  She often sat by herself on the ground, and just seemed quiet--not her usual behaviour. 

For a few days I would wander into the chook yard and just sit with KFC, rubbing her tummy and urging her to lift her head and walk around.  For a while she would do just that, but eventually she would just lay down again.  I remember spending a lot of time with her, and talking to the other 'girls' as I did so, explaining that they needed to take care with KFC, and to nurture her.  When I held KFC in my lap, while sitting on the ground in the chook yard, she would be so happy, and try so hard to be her old self, but I knew that when I left, she would just lay down again.

Unfortunately the day arrived when KFC just didn't wake up, or try to move..she just quietly died.  The other chooks looked at her, but didn't bother her or go near her--I like to think that they too were sad at her loss.

We buried KFC in a small plot on the far side of our driveway.  Somehow, even though I enjoyed our other chooks, and even taught Red how to climb a small ladder of branches I had put in the wire mesh of the chook yard, and then taught her to jump off the highest branch, which was a great trick--it wasn't the same as having KFC greet us everyday...some pets are very noticeable in their absence.  That was KFC!

Baseball and Prunes

When I was about 10 I chose to go to a camp run by my church, instead of going to the Girl Scout Camp that some of my friends were going to - don't really know why- maybe because it was a long distance away from home, and I was definitely my own individual--guess I just wanted the challenge.

A few kids from my church came also--but I was put in a cabin with about 6 other girls and didn't know a single one..suited me just fine.  I could invent me if I wanted to--but mainly I just wanted to relax and have fun, and not be forced to build campfires, or try to earn more stupid cloth badges--I was definitely getting sick of that!  I earned a badge for roller skating!  I had been roller skating for half my life already--and on the real ones--the key lock on sort!  Why did I need a badge to prove it!

We had 6 single beds in our cabin-and we were each responsible for making our beds, and taking care of our belongings--that was OK.  I knew about this stuff--I tried to make my bed one day, and make it so tucked in that I could drop a coin on it and it would bounce--like in the army--but I didn't have a quarter.  Maybe if I had a nickel the 5 cent part may have worked in my favour, but my thin, small dime didn't do anything but just lay there--I figured a bouncing coin test needed the weight of a quarter, which at bed making time wasn't easy to come by!  Anyway, the 10 cent piece didn't bounce as I had hoped, but my bed was tight! (It's worth noting here that our cabin won first place in neatness--I think by the end of camp we cabin - mates all tried to bounce our coins--must have been some great army trick!)

The only problem with going to a church camp was that at times there were sort of bible lessons-which was OK, because they were like stories and sometimes they were good stories, but the main problem was a girl who always sat behind me, as we sat on the floor under the covered area.  As it was a camp, there were always bugs, and in this covered area, there were a lot of Daddy Long Legs.  Now I HATE spiders--even more so back then.  So this girl - no- this yucky awful girl would make sure she would find a way to sit behind me, and she would capture these spiders, and pull their legs off, and throw their bodies at me!  It was awful, right!!  And this was in bible class!  I mean --who was this girl!  After about the third day, I couldn't take it anymore, and I just jumped up and yelled out loudly that this girl was killing God's Creatures and torturing me with them.  The whole place went quiet--briefly..then I just ran out.

Well, the girl was given a "a good talking to" and I was calmed down...but told that if I didn't want to attend the bible classes every day, it was OK--that was a good thing I thought--so I explored a lot when I didn't like the idea of the story that day...pretty good camp experience so far! 

In mid mornings, after our cafeteria hall breakfasts, we would have these bible classes, then go off to play sport--especially baseball. I wasn't a good batter, but I was a terrific runner and would often play outfield .....  It was fun. It reminded me of home where I played as a kid with my neighbourhood friends, and was the chosen runner, instead of batting--some kid would bat, and if they were lousy runners I would run for them---made sense to us!

Well, back to breakfast - every morning as we sat down at our assigned tables set out with cutlery and breakfast dishes, along with jugs of juice and milk, there were also small bowls of prepared fruit pieces by each plate.  On this particular day, the chosen  fruit was prunes.  We were expected to eat all of our small fruit pieces--but prunes weren't going to be a good fruit choice that day for a lot of the campers. Me?  I loved prunes!  So I offered to eat as many of the tables' prunes as I could so that we could be excused--and I did--just never knew what the consequences would be.

It was the game of the week that day--we were almost winning--but suddenly my tummy started to rumble, and I felt funny. I was in my usual place in outfield, and was waiting for a ball to come my way, when suddenly I just knew that something else was about to come my way.  I shifted nervously from foot to foot, and knew that I was in trouble....the toilet block was just off to the left of the field, and I was hoping like anything that this inning was going to end soon--but it just kept happening--I was fidgeting more and more, and the uneasy feeling I had wasn't getting any better.

Suddenly I just threw my mitt down on the ground, threw my arm up in the air and ran like mad to that toilet block....just in time! There was a major explosion from my backside as I skid onto one of the toilets--it was like I had just made my own home run! By the time I emerged from the toilets, the game was over, our team had lost, and I was told by the coach that eating over 25 plus prunes was never a good idea before a game. I sort of knew that by then, but all the same--it was a lesson--bet the girl scout camp wasn't giving away badges for learning that!

It's the small things.. sometimes literally

Today I went shopping to do some errands and hopefully find what I wanted in a few shops.  As I was walking through this Centre a small 2-3 year old boy, while holding his Mum's hand kept turning around and looking at me.  Finally I couldn't resist, and just smiled at him--Wow! What he smile he flashed back at me.  I kept walking and thinking 'What a cutie' then started thinking again about what it was I was really hoping to find on this shopping trip--the sad thing is, I now have to carry a list with some items written down, so that I don't forget to remember, you know what I mean.

Anyway, while standing in the main Centre, I suddenly was grabbed on my lower legs, and this little boy was just hugging them and smiling up at me. I was surprised and looked around for his Mother, and she was standing off to the side, smiling. I looked at her quizzically and just smiled back at this little 'love child' and finally said:

"Thank you darling, everyone always needs hugs--I will carry your hug for me today and it will make me smile! Now run over to Mummy and tell her that she is very lucky that you are her little boy!" 

He smiled at me, and ran towards his Mum. I smiled at her and watched them walk away, waving as they went..

What a rare gift that little boy gave me.

While thinking about him and still smiling, I entered the local K-Mart store in that Centre, hoping to find some kitchen item, but no--they didn't have it....so I wandered down to the dvd/blu-ray section to see if there was anything there that looked interesting. While standing and looking in the alphabetical dvd aisles, I noticed a young 5-6 year old girl who appeared to be following my movements.  I stopped  looking for dvds and just turned and looked at her. 

"You're pretty she said" with a big smile on her face.  I was amazed, and just suddenly smiled at her saying quietly to her:

"Thank you for saying that - You are very pretty too!"  And with that simple statement between us girls--she smiled and ran off to find her Mum..

Kids--their complete reactions to me and life in general always just amaze me!

Thinking about life...

For the last few weeks I have gone through what one can only phrase as a "Living Hell".  Some weeks ago I was prescribed a very strong antibiotic for a skin irritation on my lower legs--it was a 5 day medication--after about the 3rd day I started to react to this medication--(my doctor was OS so I was going to whatever doctor in that practice could see me).  I suddenly started to develop a horrible itchy rash on my arms, which only wet cloths and patience could handle---I was running out of patience....I went back again, this time to a different doctor (only one available), who prescribed a rather strong corticosteroid cream for my arms--rather strong was the word!  My arms have been burned very severely!  I would call it a chemical burn!

Anyway--this is where my body has been and my mind at times as I have tried to deal with it all.  Pain is an awful thing, and those who go through it on a constant basis have my full understanding...

I noticed this morning however that my arms are beginning to heal--thanks to good ol' wet cloth treatments and Aussie's own Savlon! But it has taken weeks to get here...so after my early morning fruit and vitamin intake program, I went back up to bed to try to get some more sleep--but -- nope!  Wasn't going to happen...so I sat on our bedroom deck and surveyed our surrounds and must admit, that we do live in a paradise, and I have to keep reminding myself of that.

Sometimes it's not easy, when there is pain or frustration involved..but I guess one just has to look forward and know that it won't always be this way..and in my case, I can see the corner and perhaps it is just about ready to turn

I originally started to write this blog in order to celebrate my life, and those in it, and to appreciate each happy memory, but as my blog has shown..along life's way, there are struggles, and stresses (both physically and mentally) and then there are celebrations!  It is the celebrations we all need to remember and write about..no one cares about the struggles--maybe just that you had them--makes you seems more human perhaps.

Anyway, I dedicate this story to you--to the celebrations, the happiness of life, and the acknowledgment of any struggles you may have gone through--

You are a strong person, and someone who can light a pathway for another one person perhaps!

Love your life too!~

The black suited brigade - part 3

A few years passed  and it was discovered that my constant back pain (which I always blamed on a badly managed gymnastics accident at school), was getting impossible to deal with.  On a summer holiday on the Sunshine coast, in desperation, we had found an unusually gifted chiropractor who really helped me.  After x-rays it was discovered that I had dissolving discs due to spinal pressure, and that with a bit of manipulation, it was able to be relieved.  However, it wasn't resolving the disc issue in just that short time.  So..after returning home, and still suffering, it was decided that I would live near this chiropractor for at least a month and receive the hopefully healing treatment I needed.

I moved into an apartment near Cotton Tree, on the Moloolaba coast line in southern Queensland.  I had no vehicle purposely, as walking was going to be my new best friend.  I received very frequent treatments from this chiropractor, who was helping me to release the pressure from my damaged discs, and lived just a short walk away from the beach purposely, so that walking on the loose sand would strengthen me.

After about 2 weeks of this lifestyle, it was apparent that Lauren, who was only 3, was a handful for John to try to manage. As he was running our business and Bronwyn had just started school, Lauren just didn't fit into the normal daily routine, so it was decided that she would come and live with me in this temporary home. 

The apartment had a main but poorly lit internal, cement staired stairway that lead up to the apartment, which was a 2 level apartment, with 2 bedrooms etc on the lower floor, and the kitchen and living area on the first floor.  It wasn't very swanky but I made sure it was clean, and it had all I needed.  There was also a second stairway which was narrow and even darker, and it led from the ground to my kitchen area level, and to the flat across the way from me, but no one lived in the other apartment. When I had first arrived, the kitchen window didn't have any curtains or window coverings, and being on my own in a strange place, it bothered me that people could see into the kitchen at night-time etc. So one day I bought some inexpensive material and and hand-made some curtains for that window.

One night I had gotten Lauren to sleep, and I was watching TV. Suddenly there was a knock on that very dark stairway's access which led to my kitchen door landing.  As I was basically on my own, I just tried to ignore it, making sure the door was securely locked.  But the knocking continued.  This went on for a few knocks. Finally I went to the never used door, and with the chain lock secure I called out: "Who is there?  What do you want?" I was very frightened as no one had used this stairway before and I didn't know anyone who would want to use it to talk with me.

"We just have news to tell you, and need to share this with you now."

"What news?"  I yelled through the locked door. 

"We need to tell you about the inevitable future and how it will affect you!" 

Did this mean that my apartment was going to change and this was management, or what were they meaning?  Now this was about 8:00 pm, in a dark stairway, and I was completely alone.  I was feeling somewhat frightened!

Through the chained crack in the door I yelled at them: "Go away!  I don't want to hear anything from you!  Do you know what time it is?  If it's important you can tell me in the morning!"  I peered through the crack in the chained doorway and tried to see who was talking, but in the darkened stairway it was very difficult....

"But we just want to talk with you about your future and the possibilities of eternal life when the world ends" Then I knew! You guessed it - "the black suited brigade" was there! This story again!

Angrily, I opened the door, and yelled at them: " I have just called the police and they are their way to arrest you for harassment. (bit of a stretch of the truth) so I suggest you leave quickly and never come near me again.  I can't believe you idiots!  You are insane!  I don't need you and I don't want to hear anything you have to say!  You just won't learn, and I refuse to put up with any more of your propaganda and hype!"

They started to protest, but I was really angry this time, and slammed the door quickly and very hard,  just as one of them was quickly reaching for it to try to get in.  I hope I hurt him. 

All I can say is if this is how they want to spread their version of Christianity, they have definitely lost the plot.

God help us all!

The black suited brigade- part 2

You read previously about the invasion of my peace and privacy by the 'black suited brigade'.  My husband, after reading this story, said I acted more polite to them than most.  At the time, I didn't think about how I was treating them - they were just invading my space and I didn't like it.  He said he would have been more rude to them, but I guess I wanted to make them suffer in the hot sun while they carried on with their constant liturgy- I thought that was a good punishment for disturbing my private space.  Even though it was obvious - they just wouldn't leave. After I felt as though I made them cook enough in the hot sun, I bid farewell- so - yes- did I handle them politely- perhaps not.  But they were dealing with me now!

A few years later, I was a very happy and contented Mother of a 2 1/2 year old and a small baby.  It was mid afternoon and I had just settled my young daughter in her 'feeding chair', a small wooden rocker, (which by the way still exists in my study), and she got ready to 'feed' her baby - a much loved doll. I was also settling down to quietly breastfeed my baby girl, so that we could all try to get some nap time that afternoon.  Suddenly there was a loud knock at our wooden kitchen door.

I hadn't even heard a vehicle drive up the long gravel driveway of our farming property, so I was a bit worried and yet perturbed at this interference at the same time.  I told Bron to stay where she was, and holding Lauren in my arms and covering myself up, I quickly went down to the kitchen door to see who was standing on the other side of the glass door window.  But- guess who!!  It was 'the black suited brigade' standing at my door.  Was I irritated?  You betcha!

I opened the door, saying "Look..I'm not interested and as you can see--I'm very busy and preoccupied here!"

But they wouldn't take no for an answer!  So, as you can imagine, I was really beginning to boil inside---I always have hated anyone's invasion into my privacy--but these guys just would not give up!  By now Lauren was hungrily crying, and Bron, frightened, had started to wander down the hallway, to see what was going on. 

Yelling out above Lauren's incessant crying, I quickly called out to Bronwyn: ' Darling. It's OK. Mummy has to deal with this --just go into your bedroom, and play with your toys, and I'll come get you soon. OK?"

"OK, Mummy", she replied as she headed towards her room. 

I was feeling desperate with a crying and screaming baby by now, I felt I was forced to invite this 'black suited brigade' into my house as I couldn't just keep standing at the door with Lauren crying in my arms.

As soon as they got inside inside they started: "We are here to let you know that the world is coming to an end, and we just want to know if you are prepared?"  Now I was angry.

"What are you playing at?" I said somewhat loudly to them.  "I cannot believe that with all that I am trying to contend with here, that you now say something like that!  Are you insane?"

"Ma'am, we just are trying to help you to get ready and make sure that you are prepared for what may lay ahead"

"Ready? Ready?" It suddenly hit me what I had to do.  Holding Lauren in my arms I went over to the kitchen counter, and opening a drawer took out a large butcher knife.  I knew they were watching me, as they had stopped talking.

"OK.  If I have to get ready as you say, then we should probably start with this one. If the world is really coming to an end, I don't want any unnecessary suffering to happen to my children, so we might as well end her life now, as quickly as possible". 

With that I pulled out the large butcher knife and then continued:"Which part do you want to do?  Hold her while I slit her throat as one would do to a lamb, or do you two want me to hold her and you do the killing?"

I held out the knife, and waited for an answer.

They were shocked. Which is what I wanted them to be.

"Look.  We're sorry.  Perhaps we came on too strong, or you have taken the wrong reaction, but it is OK.  None of us have to do this!  This world isn't coming to an end right now.."

I was so angry it was all I could do not to shout at them--but calmly, I looked at them and simply stated: " You are idiots!  How many homes and people have you done this same routine to?  How many people may have reacted for real just like I did?  You are so lucky that I knew what I was doing, and was hoping to teach you a lesson.  Now get out of my house and never come near me again, or anyone else.  You are useless, and not a good representative of anyone.  You are dangerous, and need to be stopped.  Now leave.  I despise what you are doing!"

They quickly ran out the door, and I watched them as they jumped in their car, which their god must have paid a lot of money to own, and left.

I gently held Lauren, and shaking just a bit, went back into the house, and putting that stupid butcher knife away safely in its drawer, I started up the hallway to find Bronwyn, and settle us all once again for a quiet afternoon.

(It is worth noting that I was a drama teacher!)

The black suited brigade!

I will probably make enemies as I write this, but one has to remember that never at any stage have I ever invited the 'black suited brigade' to come to my home and try to preach to me.  I have my own beliefs and my own religion- 'Thank you very much!'  I just never needed them to remind me of the upcoming world's end, or any other shock tactic they ever wished to choose.

My first episode with the 'black suited brigade' was when I was in my mid-twenties, and newly married.  I had a day off from teaching, and I was just in the process of giving a bubble bath to our puppy Elsa (a red Australian terrier), and our adopted cat, Snow ( a deserted and then found struggling kitten with sun burnt white ears, who John had found a bit battered on his parents farm). They loved the bubble baths which always surprised our friends and family!  I would let them play in the tub as I put on my bikini, then would gradually and safely empty the water and bubbles while rinsing them, and then holding them gently, I would wrap them in the towels that were laying waiting on the bathroom floor and while wrapped in towels, I would carry them out to the front veranda, on our rented farm house.  Just us and the privacy!

On this particular late morning, I heard a car coming up our country road to our house, and then park outside of our 6 foot high front gate way.  Without even knocking or singing out, these two black suited strangers suddenly entered my front area, where I had been just sitting and enjoying my time with my two pets, my frosty coke and ice, and the morning sun.

As I was only in my bikini, I was already feeling insulted by their behaviour, and then they opened their mouths.  Then I was angry!  My two small pets were frightened and Elsa was trying very hard to be a good guard dog--she wouldn't let them come very close to me and as they moved, she nipped at their feet- which is normal behaviour for this sort of terrier.  That suited me just fine, so I didn't call her off. 

They continued to stand there in the hot sun and started to profess the end of the world usual liturgy and I just sat, sipping my large icy coke and let them talk themselves out.  I was hearing about the end of the world coming soon, and was I prepared, etc...the usual stuff.  When they ran out of breath and bible passages, I sat there very calmly and slowly quoted a bible verse right back at them, defeating their arguments. They were a bit stunned and clearly thrown off--but I just smiled and told them that as a child I had attended for many years a Baptist church and had been very involved in bible study until about the age of 13-14.  I knew my stuff!

They continued to stand in the hot sun, trying to convince me that only what they were saying was correct, and I just quoted bible verses back at them, while I sipped my cold drink and sucked on the ice blocks....this went on for a while...Elsa kept her guard watch and never wavered, but Snow was obviously bored, and eventually jumped off the veranda and lazily strolled over to the  'black suited brigade', sniffed their shoes, and with a dismissal that only a cat can do , she haughtily walked away. 

Eventually, I noticed that my icy coke glass was empty, so I suddenly stood up, called Elsa to come to me and announced. "Well, my cold drink is empty and I am very bored with you, so I am now going inside.  Don't come back--in fact don't approach anyone else here in this community...we don't need or want you.  Goodbye!"  With that I just walked in the front door and securely locked it.

Get ready for Part 2 - yep that means it just kept happening...

Mercury poisoning

When I was somewhere between 2-3 in age, I must have hurt myself, and as all Mothers did, my Mum put Mercurochrome on that injury --only to discover that I was allergic to mercury!  I ended up with mercury poisoning, and to hear her tell me the story way back when, it was pretty serious!

All that I remember from that experience was that I was left on my own in a big room, in a hospital, with large windows and I was in a baby's cot.  It was made of dark wood, and all I remember doing is trying to get out of there! 

There were nurses (I guess) but they looked like Nuns, and it appeared that I was in a Catholic hospital, (but of course I didn't know that!)  In an attempt to make my hospital room more friendly, there had been a few stuffed animals put on the wide window sill of my room.  So at one stage, after much maneuvering, I managed to climb out of my cot, and dropped to the floor, and of course proceeded to that window sill, in order to better inspect these rare treasures!   I climbed up onto the window sill, and started to reach for the toys, when the nun /nurses came into the room...they panicked and grabbed me, probably surprised that I was after all a crafty and very smart baby-"Don't fence me in sister!",  I thought as they grabbed me!

This was apparently a trick I learned very early on in my own cot, and Dad and Mum had to keep trying to figure out how to keep me from escaping.  Apparently I don't like the look of bars--good thing I have never been arrested  or put behind bars--who knows what I would have done---but there I go again, getting off the subject--where was I?  Oh yeah--well--what right did these nun/nurses have to show me the toys and not let me have them?  Maybe this was a prison!!

It makes me wonder if the window was open and there wasn't a screen--ooh!  I could have fallen!  But major pay-out to Mum and Dad for my death--why does my brain think this way sometimes!  Because it does is the answer...I'm sure there must have been a window screen--so why did the nun/nurses panic?  Too many law suits that month?

Anyway, after that episode I was actually tied into my cot with a net over the top so that I couldn't escape..I was still alone in this room, and I still don't remember any toys to play with. I do remember trying to learn how to untie these nun knots--but they were tricky, and they had a few more years of practice at it that I did!

Finally my Mum and Dad came to take me home, but do you know what I had to do before they could rescue me from this nun/nurse crazy house?  I had to do a poo in a special potty. C'mon..a poo! Can you do a poo on cue?  I'm rhyming and I don't even mean to!  Hey!  I was so young--but I was so determined to escape this nun/nurse place, that I must have obliged, after probably much inspection, and lots of discussion, my poo passed all tests ... so my poo and I were released and free to go home.

To this day, when doctors ask me if I am allergic to anything I always mention mercury--they look at me quizzically, wondering why in the world I would say that or even know it, and still I have my reasons! :-))