After my bought of accidents recently - ('Oops, I did it again' ), I was telling my daughter Bronwyn about my shoe sizing catastrophe from last year. She was laughing so hard - that's what happens in our family when one of us gets hurt--we laugh--kind of like watching the ol' Charlie Chaplin films I guess- once it has been determined that the family member is OK, we just crack up at their discomfort---well this had her really cracking up!
I had been out shopping one day, and my shoes were feeling tight and my feet were really hurting, so I went into one of those less expensive shoe stores, with grocery type shelves of shoes, and tried on a pair that just felt so good. I told the salesgirl to wrap up the good leather shoes I had been wearing, and I wore the new beauties home. They were a size 9, and I usually wear a size 8 shoe, but perhaps my feet were swollen from all the shopping I had done, as they felt great!
When I got home, I put them in my cupboard until the next time, and went about putting my shopping away.
A few weeks later, I had a big shopping day ahead of me, so I grabbed and size 9s and jumped in my car. It all started out innocently enough:
I had been in a large discount department store, in a major shopping centre, and was coming out after paying for my purchases, carrying a bag, and giving some smiles to people as I walked quickly to my next shop - when suddenly, my foot slipped, I slid across the floor in front of a lot of people and fell straight down on the floor with my purchases splaying out in front in me! Embarrassed, I got up, collected my bags, and stood- looking at the floor like one does, trying to find a way to blame it- not me! I hurried on, and went to my next shopping centre, for my next errand.
This time I had purchased my items in another large well known department store, and was walking along the shopping food court, when whammo-bammo--I slipped and fell again - this time straight onto my bottom! My feet had just slid and I fell as if in slow motion! I sat there stunned for few moments, looking once again at my packages sprawled out in front of me, and was a bit embarrassed again, but getting used to it somehow, and smiled at offers of help as people near by jumped up to assist me. I brushed myself off, this time looking at my feet and mentally asked them what they were playing at! I had always treated them fairly!
I limped a bit to my car, trying not to touch my very sore bottom, and putting my packages in my car's boot, I did a sudden side-ways slide to the driver's door! I was beginning to suspect these size 9-ers may be the culprits!
I had one more stop at another well know grocery store in a very busy shopping area. I was carrying one of those little red plastic baskets with my small array of groceries in it, when I got about mid-way down an aisle, with a young lad standing on a tall ladder-type stand, stocking shelves. I looked at him, and tried to quickly go around his ladder, before the lady coming towards me with her huge grocery cart blocked my way. But no! My size 9-ers decided to have one more go--I slid a full foot on the floor and then dropped straight down on my face, catching myself with my basket in one hand and my other hand protecting my face which had a pair of glasses on it!I decided to just lay there for a while. Maybe everyone would just go away, and I could get up and leave quietly. But no!! They all gathered, with the young lad asking if he could help me as he started to descend his ladder. I sat up, and with as much dignity as possible, replied in a quite matter of fact tone:
"No, I'm getting used to this today!"
I stood up--inspected my front, brushed off my knees, checked for blood--appreciative that physically I looked OK---just stupid, and gathered my red basket and by now limped to the check-out!
I laughed all the way to my car!
People kept looking at me, and I just kept laughing.
I got home, walked in the door, barefoot this time, put my shopping in the kitchen, quietly gathered a bag from the cupboard, put my shoes into it and put it in the spare room for the next charity shop delivery of goods.
What a day!!